Learning to remove self-doubt

What do you do? Whenever I’m asked this question, I always have two answers, first my day job and second my blog. I spoke about my blog to a girl I met on holiday. I started off by speaking confidently about the blog and how it initially started out as an art sharing blog that soon turned into a lifestyle blog after I found some joy in writing. 

When I got to the crunch of sharing the blog and letting her read my posts, I felt a slight tingle of nervousness in the back of my neck, and couldn’t help but wonder what she would think of my writing. Before she could even open up the first post I immediately said my writing wasn’t that great, all those grammatical errors came to mind. She looked at me but proceeded to read and again I made the same comment. This time she responded and said why do you keep saying that. And she was right, why do I keep saying that? The only answer I could give was that I’m not a very confident person. Regardless, I felt embarrassed at the words that repeatedly kept spilling out of my mouth. Why was I cutting myself short? The inner negative critic had passed the thought barrier and was now sitting in the “I can’t believe I said that” stand.

When I first met this girl I was sitting in the hotel cafeteria reading a book by Joe Dispenza. She came over, sat opposite me and asked about the book I was reading. I told her it was a self-help book written by a neurologist. From there on we got into a conversation about understanding ourselves, our qualities and flaws, and learning to work on them. Yet here I was a few days later adding self-doubt to something I really enjoy doing. 

It is sure to say working on myself is a daily process, I am in other words a work in progress. Although at the time I did feel regret over my self-doubt, I couldn’t cripple myself over it. It was a mistake and it was made for me to learn by. And would I still feel regret if that sentence had just been a thought, possibly not?